Vegans and the dating game

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Vegans are people too.

We have, you know, the same issues as everyone else – and we also like to fall in love.

Hereth begineth the debate… To say there’s a lot written about vegan dating on social media is like saying “vegans like to argue on Facebook”, but the truth is, there is one simple rule – there are no rules!

The first law of Vegan Fight Club is that “vegan shall talk about it to everyone, everywhere – ever!”

There are so many vegan groups on Facebook, and dating is a subject that comes up again and again and again and again…

Should vegans only date vegans? Should people who become vegan while in a relationship finish that relationship? Should vegans banish meat-eating partners to the shed to eat their dinner? And so on and so on and on and on…

Again, I say, there are no rules. The human brain is a complex thing, it falls in and out of love more often than a Bon Jovi song called “In And Out Of Love” and it doesn’t always adhere to the rules of the vegan heart.

In other words, it’s up to you.

The dating game has changed beyond all recognition over the last 10 years. Now, people are just as likely to meet online as they are over a vodka and orange in the local pub. But, this means that people are able to stipulate specifically the type of person they are looking for in a partner – short, tall, fat, thin, athletic, lazy, geeky, funny, serious, vegan….

Obviously, this can mean that a huge number of potential partners are thrown into the bin of “nah” automatically!

I, personally, use Plenty Of Fish and message someone every six months or so – such are the restrictions of veganism (and being too tight to pay to find love) and I have recently signed up to Grazer.

There was a lot of excitement in vegan forums around the launch of Grazer – it’s free and it’s pretty much the vegan version of Tinder – although there are vegans on Tinder too – I know, I’ve been on there too!

The whole “swipe left” thing seems a bit cold to me – but such is the fame of Tinder that the phrase “swipe left” has become part of modern language. The main problem is that if you don’t live in London, there might be relatively few local vegans on the site. However, it is relatively new, so give it time. I also found that a lot of people don’t actually tell you anything about themselves on their profile – so you are solely judging them on a picture.

So, basically, Grazer has the same advantages and disadvantages as Tinder, but it is growing and so it’s worth joining and if there’s no one there for you, check back in a few weeks.

The likes of Plenty of Fish also have vegan profiles – but finding them can be a bit like finding a vegan in your local pub – although you can search for “vegan” and find the nearest one to have used that description lives 75 miles away – not all vegans call themselves vegans on their profile.

Then there’s Facebook. Other than having to sell your soul to Satan to sign up, this is also free – and there are plenty of vegan singles groups and pages on there – there’s even one for Vegan Singles in their 40’s (I dislike the rogue apostrophe, but otherwise it’s an excellent group) and there’s naughtier ones for vegans who like to talk about sex – A LOT. Shock, horror, vegans are interested in sex – and not just which brands of condoms are vegan-friendly.

Let’s be honest, most people are on Facebook, so joining a dating group on there is just as likely to bring you success as any “paid for” or “traditional” online dating site. I have met former partners, new friends and dates just by chatting to new friends on Facebook in the past – just the act of interacting online can bring people together.

Then there’s “real life dating”. Yes, people still meet in the pub, club, at gigs, in the gym, at work and while out bird watching (not so much). And, if you’re a vegan singleton, there are local vegan groups, food shares, animal rights meetings, vegan fairs etc etc. You can meet potential partners at all of these (vegan fairs often have speed dating events these days), but, more importantly, you can make new friends, share ideas and enjoy a social life with like-minded folks. You could always run into a sexy vegan by the “meat-free” section of your local supermarket – although I don’t recommend spending a day there on the off-chance – people might think you’re weird…And you could be asked to leave, doing your “street cred” no favours at all.

People become vegan at many stages of life – some are already in relationships with omnivores, some have been vegetarian first and some are now vegan from birth. Also, everybody’s life story is different, so the important thing is not to judge. Some people are comfortable with dating meat-eaters, some with dating vegetarians, some with only dating vegans, we all have our own preferences.

It is also worth adding that there’s a lot of advice and support available in social media forums when it comes to vegan dating, vegan love and vegan sex – vegan squirty cream wasn’t invented without sex in mind you know!

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